#43) Don’t remember, don’t forget

There’s a difference between remembering and not forgetting.

It occurred to me when I was listening to a sports talk show on the morning of the day back in June when the L.A. Kings won the Stanley Cup.  (Yeah, I know: way to keep current, D-Lock.  But hey, as we know from #36, procrastination is actually a form of productivity).  Quick background: After winning three consecutive playoff series as underdogs, the Kings won the first three games of the finals against the favored New Jersey Devils, putting them within one victory of an unlikely Stanley Cup championship.  But after losing games four and five, panic started to set in among L.A. sports fans.  The host urged Kings: “Don’t forget your Inner 8.”  Eight refers to the fact that the Kings were the eighth (and lowest) seeded team in their conference; they were the underdogs with nothing to lose.   Whether the Kings connected with their “inner 8” is anyone’s guess, but they won Game 6 and the Stanley Cup, so they must have done something right.

“Don’t forget what got you here.”  It’s advice that’s often given to athletes, movie stars, college graduates and many others.  How often do people forget their humble beginnings and let success go to their head, or simply take the good things in their life for granted?  While “remembering” can often involve reliving unpleasant episodes of the past, dwelling on negativity or perhaps pining for a time in one’s life that seemed better, “not forgetting” is a way of keeping oneself grounded, using the past solely as a tool for providing perspective on the present.

Four months into my marriage, I’ve done some remembering and I’ve done some not forgetting.  Yes, I’ve wrangled with the Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (I even followed one of them on Twitter for a while–don’t tell M.), and even the Ghost of Wife Past, but I’m only human.  It will happen from time to time.  But when it does, I turn the switch from Remembering to Not Forgetting.  My Inner 8 may have been a complete failure with women, but ultimately he became a success with the one who mattered.


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